You’re Short, Bald and Ugly, Charlie Brown

Product Code: 74097
You’re Short, Bald and Ugly, Charlie Brown

You’re Short, Bald and Ugly, Charlie Brown

Product Code: 74097
Regular price $300.00
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A rare send-up of Charles Schulz's Peanuts by Joe Matt, Seth, and Chester Brown.

From comicbookdaily.com:

...one of the most interesting pieces of 1990s Canadian comic book lore is a little-known one-shot called You’re Short, Bald and Ugly Charlie Brown. This one-shot first appeared c. 1993 and features Peanuts strips that have had their dialogue replaced. As lore would have it, members of the Toronto Three would have copies available when they appeared at zine fairs around Toronto, but would feign ignorance about its origin.

Ultimately, this roasted Peanuts book is a bizarre alteration of Charles Schulz’s classic characters. It’s an uninhibited example of culture-jamming. The zine contains three distinct sections, all of which are quite subversive. The first section replaces the dialogue with R-Rated material where the characters swear, talk about sex, and discuss other adult themes. The second section is a fully formed short story called “Billiards” where Charlie Brown is now referred to as “Diego” and Linus is named “Juan.” In the story, Juan’s mother has purchased a billiards table and slowly descends into madness. The third section of the comic involves several strips where Charlie Brown and Linus are presented as gay men who are struggling to come out of the closet.

Zine buyers immediately assumed that Seth, Joe Matt, and Chester Brown were behind this comic, but the men all denied having anything to do with it, claiming they were selling it for a friend. Eagle-eyed readers, however, can compare the lettering of the three sections with comics released by the men through Drawn & Quarterly. In doing so it becomes obvious that Joe Matt was behind the first section, Chester Brown had written “Billiards” and Seth had crafted the third section of the comic. Nevertheless, the Toronto Three continued to deny involvement for nearly two decades.

You’re Short, Bald and Ugly Charlie Brown is an extremely rare comic. Rumour has it that only 300 copies were printed. That said to my knowledge this have never been verified. I am aware of three cover variants. The most commonly seen is an orange cover. The Poopsheet Foundation has a pink cover variant as the example in their archive. Meanwhile, the copy I have in my files sports a grey cover. It is unknown if these represent different print runs or if the different colours were all available at the same time.

Ultimately, this may be one of the most interesting items that that Toronto Three ever produced. I believe that it is their only true collaboration as a group, which makes it more significant than it initially appears to be.

https://www.comicbookdaily.com/columns/forgotten-silver/youre-short-bald-and-ugly-charlie-brown/

From dangerousminds.net:

In 1993 a self-published mini-comic with a small run of 300 started making the rounds, with the title “You’re Short, Bald and Ugly, Charlie Brown!” in the familiar bubble letters similar to the ones Schulz used in many Sunday strips. The small volume was credited to “Dr. Casey ‘Sparky’ Finnegan,” which apparently is a reference to a Canadian children’s television series called Mr. Dressup (“Sparky” was the real life nickname of Charles Schulz). The volume was billed as a “A Roasted Peanuts Book.” At first glance, it was easy to take the strange strips inside for actual Peanuts strips, until one looked closer….. the dialogue didn’t match, indeed it was very rude in places.

“You’re Short, Bald and Ugly, Charlie Brown!” has three sections, each the work of an individual detournist using a similar technique of replacing Schulz’s original dialogue. The first section simply places R-rated dialogue into the bubbles of Linus, Sally, Lucy, and the like, while the third section has Linus crushing hard on the kid with the big round head. The middle section, titled “Billiards,” takes a more original approach, turning a bunch of Charlie Brown/Linus panels into a kind of telenovela, perhaps, or a workaday translation of a finely wrought Argentinian novel, as in: “Juan, is your mother still playing herself silly with the billiards table that is in your family’s home?”

In 2010 (just a couple days after Garrity’s item), noted cartoonist Joe Matt published a confession of sorts in The Comics Journal website, explaining that a trio of cartoonists working in Canada, consisting of Joe Matt, Seth (as his works are credited to), and Chester Brown, was responsible for the jape. It’s an impressive group: Joe Matt’s Peepshow came out to raves in 2003, and Chester Brown has released several acclaimed books for Drawn & Quarterly, including Ed the Happy Clown and The Playboy.

Matt explained that, as with so many artistic endeavors, “You’re Short, Bald and Ugly, Charlie Brown!” started in a casual, almost accidental way, quite similar to Brion Gysin’s invention of the powerful cutup technique. Here’s Matt:

Here was a night, maybe sometime around 1993, when I was working on an issue of my comic book, “Peepshow” and I was using some xeroxes of PEANUTS strips from the collection, “You Can Do It, Charlie Brown” as blotter-paper. (Blotter-paper meaning: any clean paper that was handy and could be folded in half and used to rest my hand on while inking in order to protect the original art underneath.)

Anyway, there came a moment when I was using white-out and to remove some excess white-out from my brush, I wiped it on the blotter paper beneath my hand. And that’s how I came to idly white-out the words balloons on a few PEANUTS strips.

Once I saw the balloons whited-out and forgot what they originally said, I began filling them with the first, perverted thing my brain thought they might say…

It’s evident that the standout “Billiards” section was done by Chester Brown–you can tell his lettering a mile away.

https://dangerousminds.net/comments/youre_short_bald_and_ugly_charlie_brown/

Seth, Joe Matt, Chester Brown

Condition & Attributes

Very Fine

Publishing Information

Canada
1991
1st

Physical Description

7.8 inches
5.1 inches
24 pages
black & white
Softcover
wraps
English

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